past

It’s been 14 years

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When you first came into this world, innocent and beautiful, I was scared to death though I never told anyone. I was worried what the world was going to do to you. But now as you are growing up and I see the confidence you have, I am less worried. I am not going to say I am not because I still am your mom. I will always worry, but I see the young woman you are becoming and I see your confidence growing every day. I see what your potential is and I hope you can achieve all your dreams what ever they may be. I hope your life will be smooth and not have too many potholes to fall in. You are so amazing and beautiful. Happy 14th birthday!!

Sorry I have not been around

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Hey everyone!  I know I have not been the best blogger of late. I have not been keeping up with all my updates and everything. I am sorry. I could tell you it’s because I have been doing so much and just did not have the time (that’s partially true). Or I could tell you I just did not have anything to write about. Or even still I could tell you I was just tired of it and needed space.

All of it is true and not true.

I have been busy with life and all of the changes that come with it. I have had to make decisions again in my life as to what is important and not so much anymore. As I said in a previous post I was going back to a place that I no longer wanted to be but I could feel myself slipping down again. So I had to take a step back and do some major soul searching. I had to come to a realization I was more important then what anyone could say or do. I found a few things when doing that:

  1. I am me. No one can change me except me.
  2. People will always be envious. I don’t say everyone does it intentionally sometimes it’s unintentional. I feel that way as well sometimes. It’s natural. But how you treat people is up to you
  3. Not everyone has your best interests at heart…even if they love you.
  4. Life is too short to really care about what the haters think.
  5. Things usually are not as bad as they seem and they can always be worse then what they are.

I know most of these are givens and I know everyone will agree that we all can use improvements. I am trying to make a better me. Maybe I am trying to hard but I don’t think so. I look at myself now and what I was 12 or 13 years ago and I see how far I have come. It’s not been an easy trip. I have had to leave things behind. But when I look at them now…I realize how unimportant they were. But I also realize without those things I would not be the person I am now.