Hey all…just letting you know

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I’m still around!! Sorry I have not been really blogging too much recently. I’ve had somethings I needed to get straight in my head and life. I am still working on a few things because if I don’t straighten them out I will regret it. I have to put things in their places and stop worrying so much what everyone else thinks. But you know what…it’s hard. Especially when it’s people that are a major part of your life. I am lucky this time. I have an amazing husband that helps me realize things that are said disappear with the breeze and things that are done are forgotten about after they do them. He has shown me that I cannot allow everything to get to me.

All that being said, my life is coming back together and I will be posting again. It’ll just be a little bit longer. I will be back 🙂

Why?

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Honestly I wonder why I try to make an attempt to rebuild burned bridges. I honestly try to make amends but when I make the attempt it seems that I am being pulled back into a ridiculous, nonsense, stressful situation. I feel I am being manipulated all over again so this person can get what they want or just for them to cause chaos in my life because I am in a better place then I used be. That they just want to pull me back down into the muck and make me what I used to be. Their jealousy is so strong. I love them so much but this last time I went to visit I could just feel the manipulation in everything they said. I find out everything we talked about was twisted and turned into something that none of it was meant to be. I should’ve learned but what can I say, maybe I’m a glutton for punishment…? I am not going to let them drag me back. I am not going to fall into those destructive habits. I am a better, stronger person. But it is so hard when it is someone you love and care about so much and they know it and use that to make your own self doubts and insecurities come out. Sigh…not much can be done.

All I know is burned once, burned twice it can be forgotten. Burned three times then I am the fool. I won’t be doing it a third time.

Mindless Masses

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I flip the TV on and see in awe

How it seems each time I turn

CNN is running constant reruns

On the latest shooting  or the last bomb

and wonder if we just walked away

and to never again see

CNN, FOX, or CNBC

we could probably live life

without all the violence

But of course

we can never peel away

Then I begin to wonder

are the reporters any better

Or are they just another version

I see the gleam in their eyes

When they report on the latest death

Or maybe a crocodile tear

to show they are sincere?

So here I am again

reaching for the remote and begin to wonder

am I no different?

Do I sit and watch the car wreck that is the news

or can I turn it off

and read a good book instead

 

©MGA