sigh…..

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Today me and hubby had an argument. This is not going to be a he said, she said, husband bashing post. I won’t do that because he is a good husband and to be honest he was right about some things. Things I need to work on as a mom. Like all couples we do have arguments but I think this brought up a lot of insecurities on my part. You know the ones…am I good mom? am I a good mother? am I a good wife? am I doing the right thing homeschooling? am I doing things right? etc. I don’t think he even knows that I have all of these insecurities. Maybe honestly I am to blame because I put up this front that I can do anything. But I have had to all of my life and it is hard to let it go…I really don’t know. But the one thing I he does not understand is how much goes on when he is not home. I wish I could let him see what went on when he was not home….the good and the bad…then he would understand. But as it is we cannot come to terms because he really does not know and we have an argument…and I’m on here at 11:30 at night writing this. Do I love my husband? a resounding yes!!! I will always love him no matter what. But tonight it’s hard to say it.

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